The Secret to Nap Time

The Secret to Nap Time

The story is important. It must be long enough to calm, short enough to avoid premature sleep, and it must involve rhythm.

Use of the bathroom is imperative. After the story, before the nap. A movement oriented transition is necessary.

Return to a dim room. Only gently filtered natural light. No frightening black dark, no assaulting bright intrusion. To this rule there are no exceptions.

Music will make or break nap time. Never choose words. Words focus your brain on a subject, sleep comes with wandering thoughts. The meter must roll like long slow waves. Quiet volume is essential, pulling, not pushing.

The act of tucking in spins security, furthered by the careful choice of blanket. Soft but not fuzzy, covering the whole body, but not twice the whole body. Loose weave is unintelligent, caught fingers and toes trap frightened dreams. Also warm, but not hot, comfort is non-negotiable.

Finally the back rub. The art of the backrub is learned only by feel, by instinct. You can do it, or you can't.

Begin by laying the child on their side so that you are reaching over them to lay your dominant hand on their back. Whisper goodnight. Smoothe the child's clothing and blanket to create an unrumpled surface. As she lays there, begin to rub the center of her back in circles.

Here lies the instinct. Do not allow your hand to run into his shoulders. Stay carefully in the upper center of his back. Rub in concentric circles. In the same continuous motion, in the same size circle, with the same weight. Not hard enough to move him, but just firm enough to give the effect of making him heavy.

DoNotStop

Either you can do it or you can't.

Maybe you can see her eyes, maybe you cannot. But you can feel his breathing. Deep and slow and rhythmic and soon she will sleep. Maybe your arm is sore, maybe you are tired too. But his eyes still flutter or his feet still brush. You can give up.

Or you can last just a little bit longer.

You will have to know when to stop.

Either you will or you won't.

Slow your hand and rub more and more gently till you're just rubbing air. Breathe a long breath. Lean back and wait quietly. Watch her closely. Listen to him breathe.

It’s feeling when. Everything is feeling.

My favorite part of the day is a room full of small children lulled to sleep under my hands, a privilege that leaves me breathless in a room of deep even breathing.