The Moment I Met Jesus in my Heart

The Moment I met Jesus in My heart

For Steve Treichler who gave me my faith

I sat in that hard pew

rapt attention encasing me

because the question set me apart.

It broke me, and fixed me, confused and explained, and set me apart .

Pastor Steve, in his typical way,had  found a way to catch me in his net of fish, and then tell me I could breathe out of water.

And made it true.

And he got exactly the answer he expected with all the raised hands in the room.

But not mine.

Because I knew the truth.

Without thinking about it, and with no question, I knew my truth.

And that day, when I was so afraid to admit what was inside, what has always been inside,

he stood there and said that what I already knew, was everybody's truth,

they just didn't know it.

I never told him that was my defining moment, the moment I became His.

Later, I learned the depth and truth of the Savior I had chosen,

but in that moment, in that knowledge that I not only had permission to be what I was, it was exactly what I was supposed to be, what we all were, why we needed a savior at all.

He set me free from my anger and rebellion and hatred and resistance.

I'm not going to say I never strugled with it again, not going to say I never even aimed to be perfect, not going to say I never questioned or faltered.

But that question has rung in my life every day since he asked it.

“Do you know Jesus personally?”

And everyone's hand went up but mine.

“Do you know Satan personally?”

And none raised their hand but in my terribly clear mind, I knew.

I knew that's all I knew.

And in that moment I found suddenly

that I could choose the other voice. The truth. And I listened to him speak of the deciever, and the love of Christ, and barely hearing him, I heard Him.

And I chose.

And I never told you Steve, never said the words that I have carried through every storm.

“Yes, I know satan personally.

I know him intimately. But now I Know someone else too. And it makes every bit of difference.”